The Team

Andrew Callahan – Game Design/Public Relations

Andrew is best known for winning the 2002 10th Annual New Baltimore Cupcake Eating Contest.  There are few people in this world who can eat cupcakes faster, and he has sworn to see to the destruction of each one of them in the hopes that one may stand up step up to end his reign.  Since signing over the movie rights to his story he has had enough free time to work on something with a little less diabetes.  We are all excited.

 

Joshua Cipolla – Composer

Joshua got into music for one reason:  The chicks.  Unfortunately, nobody told him that girls think that his instrument of choice (the piano) is lame.  Since his first plan failed he began to use his music to earn money (money gets girls right?). He’s done some impressive things like: 1) providing music for commercials, NatGeoTV, games of course. 2) being seen with Bill Stitson and 3) regularly gigging solo piano or leading local “pop” and jazz groups while playing numerous instruments (most of them poorly).  Despite this, his best efforts have thus far impressed few girls.  He is now bodybuilding four hours a day and saving up for a sports car.  He also has a website.

 

Chris Hooe – Developer

If you’ve ever asked yourself: “Another Madden game? Really? Who keeps buying these?”, we’d like to introduce you to Chris Hooe. As SRRN’s primary Zeppelin pilot, Chris spends most of his time dreaming about the motorcycle/volleyball montage from Top Gun. This wouldn’t be quite as creepy if he didn’t giggle mid-fantasy. He’s the chief architect behind SRRN’s upcoming geese-murder-simulator, Skies of Fury–originally titled: “I hate geese and I once bit someone who tried to convince me otherwise.”

We don’t really talk about birds around Chris anymore.

 

David Rivera – Developer

One day, David appeared on the horizon as if torn from the pages of a classic western.  For like two weeks, we wondered who that guy just chilling on the horizon was.  Until one day we found David in the conference room creating an assembly code program to make the vending machine downstairs give him free soda.  We told him this it was our office but he wouldn't leave; so under the agreement he would share his free sodas.  Though his coding abilities are hard to match it's his ability to keep Alessandro under control that makes him an invaluable member of our team.

 

Dan Magnusson – Developer

We briefly considered making Dan’s bio a picture of a grilled cheese sandwich, but we couldn’t find a non-copyrighted picture and Aujang kept eating our attempts at original material. Dan is Chris’s successor in the SGD, which has led to a largely uninterrupted reign of terror/incompetency. Dan’s towering height often has him saying oddball things like: “Are children small? Or just far away?” He has an unsettling fascination with pasta, which he hoped would lead to a fun international caper, a la Ocean’s Twelve. He instead spent twelve weeks in an Italian prison and now visibly pales whenever someone mentions the name “Fabio.”

 

Brendan Mauer - Artist

Brendan is our resident goat expert.  When a trivia question about goats needs answering, Brendan is there; when a goat is in trouble, Brendan is there; when aluminum needs to be consumed, Brendan knows the closest goat farm.  When asked what his favorite thing about goats is, he responded with "I don't know, I like everything".  That's a pretty boring answer, which is why I've written most of Brendans bio about goats and not about Brendan himself.  Brendan is banking on goats being supreme being aliens which, when the apocalypse comes, will save only those with a passion for goats.  Brendan is also pretty passionate about meatball subs.

 

Alessandro Metta - Developer
 
Alessandro has a lot to say...let me revise that.  Alessandro says a lot, but often actually has very little to say.  If trolling were a job title, it would belong to Alessandro.  In all fairness, the well thought out and important additions that he makes to our conversations are often the best and result in deep philosophical discussions.  However, these are often masked by his attempts to make the office break into a spontaneous dance party.  One day Alessandro....one day.
 
 

Mike Odum – Artist

Mike really loves art. He loves art so much that he showed up at SRRN one day covered head-to-toe in scenes from Ash that he painted onto his naked body. (Readers: please don’t do this to us.) Mike insisted that the paintings were “really good,” and frankly we were a little frightened by what might happen if we a.) said they weren’t, or b.) attempted to verify his statement, so we just sort of mumbled agreement and tried to avert our eyes.

He did this seventeen more times. In retrospect, it was a creative way of applying for a job we didn’t know we were offering. At the time, it was pretty terrifying. (Tyler still has nightmares about “the watercolor man.”)

 

Nicholas Parisi - Developer
 
Nick has a unique approach to programming. I'll diagram it for you:
 
1.) You request a feature that seems innocuous.
2.) Nick protests.
3.) You explain why the feature is desirous.
4.) Nick counters that not only is the feature superfluous, but the suggestion of adding it has irreparably damaged the project's timeline.
5.) You express incredulity that a mere discussion could do such a thing.
6.) He points out in the project all of the places where your request destroyed valuable code.
7.) You click "undo" in the code editor, raising interesting questions about the destruction of said code.
8.) You explain again that the feature needs to go in.
9.) Nick smiles charmingly and acquiesces to your request.
10.) Two weeks later, Nick reports that the feature is incorporated.
11.) The feature vaguely resembles what you originally requested. You consider this a great victory.
12.) Go to step 1.
 
 

Aaron Woodard - Artist

Aaron's voice is so deep--we're not kidding--that his nose becomes numb from vibrating if he talks too much. This is not a joke. It's like talking to James Earl Jones. Sometimes our furniture shakes when he talks. Seriously. We're really not making this up.

 

Michelle Zhang – Administrative Director

Michelle helps manage the intricate chaos that is SRRN’s internal affairs. How does she keep such an unruly bunch in line, you may ask? Well, she’s got that quintessential girl-next-door quality that keeps all of the boys in check. And since the FBI has thus far been unsuccessful in connecting her with the string of grisly murders at SRRN’s former headquarters, it looks like Michelle will be delighting us for years to come. With the blood of the innocent.

 

SRRN Alumni

 

Chris Dodge – Developer

Chris is SRRN’s mad scientist when it comes to game controllers. When not duct taping Wii sensor bars on hats or pointing TV remotes at Wiimotes, he’s skipping class to procrastinate. Fortunately, SRRN gave him deadlines which led to the completion of iLib for the iPhone. As President of the Student Game Developers at UVA, he performs the important tasks of keeping meetings short through excuses such as fatigue and hunger, and delegating away important tasks to other people. Tired and hungry, he plans to delegate away the position of President when he graduates in May 2010.

Morgan Sawyer - Artist

Once a lowly intern, turned a lowly artist, Morgan has added a lot to the SRRN team.  His major contribution being a self portrait that is currently being turned into a game.  Other than that I've been taught that if you can't say something nice you shouldn't say anything at all, sooooo....

Abby Smith - Level Design
 
There are a few things we know for sure about Abby. She's ambidextrous, which apparently attracted the attention of Siegfried, a rat that looks *exactly* like Splinter. We're like 95% sure that Siegfried agreed to teach Abby everything he knew, in the same vein that Splinter taught the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. We're not really sure what he taught her, though; to date she's performed none of the acrobatics associated with ninjutsu, and was in fact pretty upset when we threw knives at her to test her reflexes. She keeps insisting Siegfried is just a normal rat, but we won't be so easily fooled. (Although her six-week hospitalization after we threw her into a live grizzly bear cage match shows uncanny dedication to her cover story.)

 

Bill Stitson – Developer

There’s not much to say about Bill.  Ever since he quit school to make games, he doesn’t get out much or do anything interesting besides cruise Craigslist late at night looking for friends.  A long time ago he used to run D&D adventures in his basement, but hasn’t had a group to play with in a while.  When crafting a game, Bill likes to surprise his audience with concepts or little touches that they’re not used to seeing.  This comes naturally since Bill is so disconnected from the mainstream world.  Chances are good he’s reading this bio right now.

 

Joel Susaya – Intern

Joel Susaya was the last man standing in SRRN’s ULTIMATE INTERN SHOWDOWN.™ In order to secure the best talent for our rapidly growing enterprise, we conducted a nationwide search on college campuses all over the country, inviting the brightest stars to our headquarters in VA for a final round of interviews. Once our eager interns-to-be arrived, we wined and dined them at some of Charlottesville’s finest restaurants. Then we threw them into a pit inhabited by rabid bears.

Two hours later, we found Joel huddled under the skeletons of his former comrades, clutching a femur that he’d somehow shaped into a shiv. That’s when we knew we’d found a keeper.

 

Ro Givens – Graphic Designer

Ro is Team SRRNs resident female.  She puts her stellar academic background in mathematics and computer science to good use for SRRN by designing logos.  She puts her extensive expertise in parenting small children to good use for SRRN by trying to keep the partners in line.  She also thinks the piano is hot, and that people who play the guitar are lame and just do it to get the girls.  (Sorry, Josh, she’s taken.)  In addition to graphic design she also bakes.  If the boys behave themselves.

 

Steven Mond – Developer

In lieu of a traditional bio, behold -

Evidence that Steven is a robot:

Unnverving gaze
Inhuman strength
Drinks copious amounts of motor oil, claims it is good for his “lustrous human hair”
Occasionally rotates head 360 degrees
 

Evidence that Steven is human:

Surprisingly soft skin
Enjoys the company of kittens
Is not looking for Sarah Connor
 

Nathan "Ike" Jose - Developer

Ike believes that Sephiroth--Sephiroth--is the best Final Fantasy character ever created. Does anything else really need to be said?

 

Arvind Rachamadugu - Developer

In his own words:

I ended up staying up till 1:30 last night.
'Cause i heard a bug in my room.
So i spent 30 minutes trying to locate and destroy it.
It was ridiculous.
I made a trap though.
And it fell for it.
Humans win again.

 

Matthew Monasch - Developer
 
Matt is a NERF munitions expert who happens to also be able to code. He showed up one day with a NERF pistol and orders to, and I quote, "go batshit." The resulting havoc resulted in a state of emergency for the East Coast, and some meteorologists have tied this murderous rampage to multiple natural disasters. (When Hurricane Irene was announced, Matt just chuckled and quietly polished his NERF gun. We don't know what that meant but we're pretty terrified.)
 

Hunter Williams - Developer

I'm not going to tell you about Hunter. I'm going to describe how to get to Hunter's house.

First, you head west, into the setting sun. Soon the land will change, from the lush fields of civilization to the blackened lands of the Sel'Hya. It is here that you will meet the Shadow Dancers, who speak in riddles and craft strange mysteries. Should you master their tongue, they will show you the secret paths of the Old Ones, where you must travel into the Nether Plains and through the gates of Almorazak. In the land beyond the gates, wondrous creatures will attempt to dissuade you from your path, but do not heed their words! You must press onwards. When the sun and the moon become one, and the horizon weeps tears of azure, is it there that you will find the bridge to the Lost Valley. In that valley there is a monk older than time, and only he knows the words you must speak to unlock the Tower of Destiny. It is one hundred floors, each with traps and monsters more deadly than the last. And on the 100th floor, seated atop a throne of bone and blood, is Hunter's closest relative. And if you ask nicely, he'll send Hunter a letter. Or something.
 
That's how far from civilization Hunter lives. On the plus side, the last time Hunter actually made it into the office, he brought a dragon skull with him. All things considered, that was pretty cool.
 

Nathan Winder – Composer

Nathan also got into music for the chicks. But in his case they were actual baby chickens. It’s sort of a long story. Encompassing a wide array of styles and genres, Nathan’s extensive body of work consists mainly of music that hasn’t even been written yet.  His musical influences include Justin Bieber and Radiohead. He used to own a cat. Nathan currently resides in Munich, Germany where he applies his expensive musical education teaching business English, exploring the Old World, and staring at people on the bus. If you ever want to hang out, he’d be cool with that.

 

Nicholas Wasilewski – Developer

Nick can show you the world. (It’s shining, shimmering, and even splendid.) He wants to know: when did you last let your heart decide? He’ll open your eyes. (You’ll take wonder by wonder.) You’ll fly over sideways, and under, on a magic carpet ride. It’s a whole new world. (A new fantastic point of view!) No one will tell you no, or where to go. Because we can’t make this stuff up, people.

This actually happened.